Wednesday, September 16, 2009
AND NOW, a word of advice to the present hopeful filipino nursing students who take nursing just for the sake of getting an easy cashflow in US
Keep dreaming. You won't make it. =)
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Another random piece of junk article...
Manila 9:24 AM
My head feels a little heavy. No wonder. I spent almost a sleepless night yesterday. My eyes look teary and i feel that my neck is a little swollen. Damn it. An allergic reaction. Must've been those dusts.
I notice that my brothers were long gone. Rafael had his first on-job-training somewhere here in Manila while Rainier accompanies him. I decided to look on the ref and see if i could make a breakfast for myself.
Nope. Just butter, beers, water, and dried prunes. Hmmm.. that almost rhyme. I wonder if butter and prunes would make a good breakfast but decided to go against that idea and preferred to rather skip a breakfast.
... And lunch. Evidently, my brother forgot to left some money for my lunch. Looks like he's not gonna win brother of the year anytime soon.
The weather outside is still uncertain. I decided not to take a walk to the plaza until i'm sure that it's not going to rain. I'm not in the mood to do something productive so i kept the thoughts of studying for my exam away. I lie myself down in the bed again and submerge myself in a deep thought.
You know, one would think a lot of strange things when one is left alone and hungry.
Imaginations become surreal. And one could become a little uneasy and paranoid. Folks would call that a cabin fever syndrome. Reminds me a lot to Stanley Kubrick's classic horror film "The Shining."
Strangely, that case didn't happen to me this time. Instead i become a little philosophical. When you grow up you will lose some of your imaginative side. That's not a very bad thing actually. When i was a kid, my dad used to admire my vast imagination. What he didn't realize is that the same imagination gives me fear toward unrealistic stuff. Boogeyman. Zombie. Vampire. You name it.
Where were we?
Oh yea. about my philosophical thoughts.
Well, I thought about most of the stuff that the ancestors before me had probably thought of. The problem of evil. What's the purpose of my existence here on earth. Why some people could be an asshole sometime. Who or what actually is God. Why do i chose to take medtech as my course. Why on earth there's nothing edible in the refrigerator that caused me to be THIS hungry.
I can't find any answers to that question. Perhaps that would make you a good philosopher though. Answering the said questions with more questions and ending up being in a circle with no answers- as what my pastor once quoted.
One of the things that i thought of was one of the most serious conversation that i had with my dad. One of the smartest guy i've ever known. The theme was about friendship. I was surprised to find out that my dad didn't believe in true friendship.
Yep. I had the thought that you thought in your mind too. What kind of person didn't believe in friendship?
I have this personal attitude towards people that people will believe whatever they want to believe. That perfectly justifies some crazy jihad acts that you would see often in TV. That justifies why Adventist have to abstain from eating some foods. That also perfectly justifies why my church greatly emphasize the importance of having an obligatory 'gift of tongue' (mind you, i prefer to speak in jargon instead of elaborating it).
It's simple. People will believe whatever they want to believe.
Ofcourse, there's always a universal truth. For example, 1+1 would always result into 2. But if you want to argue that the answer should be "3" and whatever i did to convince you that your statement is absolutely wrong proven to be futile. then so be it.
Well, my dad didn't believe in true friendship. I state my argument that true friendship does exist. But then when one is firmly fixed into his personal belief, you couldn't do anything to change it. So instead, i ask why did he said so.
Actually i had an idea. My dad is a true businessman. A lot of people would leech unto you whenever they saw you succeed and leave you alone when you fail. I witness some of these. It's a sad reality.
I use to defend my friend in front of my parents whenever they accuse them of being a bad influence to me. Ofcourse, i would defend them. My dad would sometimes make a complete history of my friend's life based on a 5 minute glance. Then he would often said that it's okay to protect my friend- he understands that. But don't believe too much on them. This would often ends up with me asking 'why'.
It's because he doesn't believe in true friendship. It's pointless to further ask him why. He would probably answer that its because he simply didn't believe in true friendship.
I couldn't understand his point of view until i read Stephen King's novella, the body
Why didn't he believe in true friendship.
The answer is actually more apparent than what i once thought of.
It's because of the people he knew.
People that drown him down.
It's Your friends.
They drown you down.
You can't save them all.
You can only drown with them.
Now i wonder if there's such thing as a true friendship....
My head feels a little heavy. No wonder. I spent almost a sleepless night yesterday. My eyes look teary and i feel that my neck is a little swollen. Damn it. An allergic reaction. Must've been those dusts.
I notice that my brothers were long gone. Rafael had his first on-job-training somewhere here in Manila while Rainier accompanies him. I decided to look on the ref and see if i could make a breakfast for myself.
Nope. Just butter, beers, water, and dried prunes. Hmmm.. that almost rhyme. I wonder if butter and prunes would make a good breakfast but decided to go against that idea and preferred to rather skip a breakfast.
... And lunch. Evidently, my brother forgot to left some money for my lunch. Looks like he's not gonna win brother of the year anytime soon.
The weather outside is still uncertain. I decided not to take a walk to the plaza until i'm sure that it's not going to rain. I'm not in the mood to do something productive so i kept the thoughts of studying for my exam away. I lie myself down in the bed again and submerge myself in a deep thought.
You know, one would think a lot of strange things when one is left alone and hungry.
Imaginations become surreal. And one could become a little uneasy and paranoid. Folks would call that a cabin fever syndrome. Reminds me a lot to Stanley Kubrick's classic horror film "The Shining."
Strangely, that case didn't happen to me this time. Instead i become a little philosophical. When you grow up you will lose some of your imaginative side. That's not a very bad thing actually. When i was a kid, my dad used to admire my vast imagination. What he didn't realize is that the same imagination gives me fear toward unrealistic stuff. Boogeyman. Zombie. Vampire. You name it.
Where were we?
Oh yea. about my philosophical thoughts.
Well, I thought about most of the stuff that the ancestors before me had probably thought of. The problem of evil. What's the purpose of my existence here on earth. Why some people could be an asshole sometime. Who or what actually is God. Why do i chose to take medtech as my course. Why on earth there's nothing edible in the refrigerator that caused me to be THIS hungry.
I can't find any answers to that question. Perhaps that would make you a good philosopher though. Answering the said questions with more questions and ending up being in a circle with no answers- as what my pastor once quoted.
One of the things that i thought of was one of the most serious conversation that i had with my dad. One of the smartest guy i've ever known. The theme was about friendship. I was surprised to find out that my dad didn't believe in true friendship.
Yep. I had the thought that you thought in your mind too. What kind of person didn't believe in friendship?
I have this personal attitude towards people that people will believe whatever they want to believe. That perfectly justifies some crazy jihad acts that you would see often in TV. That justifies why Adventist have to abstain from eating some foods. That also perfectly justifies why my church greatly emphasize the importance of having an obligatory 'gift of tongue' (mind you, i prefer to speak in jargon instead of elaborating it).
It's simple. People will believe whatever they want to believe.
Ofcourse, there's always a universal truth. For example, 1+1 would always result into 2. But if you want to argue that the answer should be "3" and whatever i did to convince you that your statement is absolutely wrong proven to be futile. then so be it.
Well, my dad didn't believe in true friendship. I state my argument that true friendship does exist. But then when one is firmly fixed into his personal belief, you couldn't do anything to change it. So instead, i ask why did he said so.
Actually i had an idea. My dad is a true businessman. A lot of people would leech unto you whenever they saw you succeed and leave you alone when you fail. I witness some of these. It's a sad reality.
I use to defend my friend in front of my parents whenever they accuse them of being a bad influence to me. Ofcourse, i would defend them. My dad would sometimes make a complete history of my friend's life based on a 5 minute glance. Then he would often said that it's okay to protect my friend- he understands that. But don't believe too much on them. This would often ends up with me asking 'why'.
It's because he doesn't believe in true friendship. It's pointless to further ask him why. He would probably answer that its because he simply didn't believe in true friendship.
I couldn't understand his point of view until i read Stephen King's novella, the body
Why didn't he believe in true friendship.
The answer is actually more apparent than what i once thought of.
It's because of the people he knew.
People that drown him down.
It's Your friends.
They drown you down.
You can't save them all.
You can only drown with them.
Now i wonder if there's such thing as a true friendship....
Friday, August 28, 2009
Medtech WILL kill you!
i forgot if this is the 2nd, 3rd, or the 4th month of my life since i entered the Clinical Division in Medtech.
Since my last post about the interview, i kept tracks of the days and some activities that i had in my classes. But then as the days turn into nightmares i start to scratch my eyeballs out due to insanity.
The lectures sessions were okay at first. It started off simple and i think i can grasp all the information at once. By the end of the first unit exam in clinical chemistry 1 however; like a baby loaded with tons of astrophysics textbooks, that's how i would describe the craziness that happened these past few weeks.
Lab was even crazier. I heard that by next week all of the guys in my class have to donate their semen for fertility testing. No exception. Earlier today Darell told me took his place for donating sperm. For some unknown reason i just agree mindlessly. Next time this happen again, i probably should bring on some stapler to keep my big mouth shut.
*UPDATE* nahhhh... i've already done the sperm donating part. wasn't as dreadful as i thought it would be.
Enough about these mumbo-jumbo sh*t. As usual, im gonna list few things that happen these past few weeks.
Kam decided to quit medtech. Shaynne got some roses in the crushes week. Yep! evidently im still not sure how to spell Shaynne(?)'s name, plus i've just found out that she just read my blog. Hmmm i think i've made a pledge to kill anyone who reads it.... let's see. Ma'am MC's exams are evil. Ma'am Mae's lecture is way hard for me to comprehend. I think that the only conversation i could make out of with Darell is only about games and stuff... and i think he seemed to change a bit this sem. Sir Fem seems to be more 'alive' only when he's teaching. Ma'am Bel is just the complete opposite of Ma'am MC. I can't stop thinking about her. I'm now used to see Melvin without Rommel. I was right about Megan.... she does have a great personality. I see the other side of Sandy. Gerarld went missing for a couple of days.
I plan to write more random updates but then decided to go against it since the letter "H" on my keyboard jammed. Well i'll leave like this 'till next time.
Since my last post about the interview, i kept tracks of the days and some activities that i had in my classes. But then as the days turn into nightmares i start to scratch my eyeballs out due to insanity.
The lectures sessions were okay at first. It started off simple and i think i can grasp all the information at once. By the end of the first unit exam in clinical chemistry 1 however; like a baby loaded with tons of astrophysics textbooks, that's how i would describe the craziness that happened these past few weeks.
Lab was even crazier. I heard that by next week all of the guys in my class have to donate their semen for fertility testing. No exception. Earlier today Darell told me took his place for donating sperm. For some unknown reason i just agree mindlessly. Next time this happen again, i probably should bring on some stapler to keep my big mouth shut.
*UPDATE* nahhhh... i've already done the sperm donating part. wasn't as dreadful as i thought it would be.
Enough about these mumbo-jumbo sh*t. As usual, im gonna list few things that happen these past few weeks.
Kam decided to quit medtech. Shaynne got some roses in the crushes week. Yep! evidently im still not sure how to spell Shaynne(?)'s name, plus i've just found out that she just read my blog. Hmmm i think i've made a pledge to kill anyone who reads it.... let's see. Ma'am MC's exams are evil. Ma'am Mae's lecture is way hard for me to comprehend. I think that the only conversation i could make out of with Darell is only about games and stuff... and i think he seemed to change a bit this sem. Sir Fem seems to be more 'alive' only when he's teaching. Ma'am Bel is just the complete opposite of Ma'am MC. I can't stop thinking about her. I'm now used to see Melvin without Rommel. I was right about Megan.... she does have a great personality. I see the other side of Sandy. Gerarld went missing for a couple of days.
I plan to write more random updates but then decided to go against it since the letter "H" on my keyboard jammed. Well i'll leave like this 'till next time.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
"When was the last time you did something for the first time?"
She asked me that question.
Hmmm...
Surprisingly.... its terribly hard to answer that question.
Have my life become dull?
She asked me that question.
Hmmm...
Surprisingly.... its terribly hard to answer that question.
Have my life become dull?
And these are some weird thoughts that i've wondered so far
Sometimes i thought that i messed up my life.
Big time.
...I imagine now that Tony would come up to me and lecture me about all the negative attitudes that i have toward life.
But hear my argument first.
I think that all of us are in that situation at some point; But unlike others, this is not the kind of "mess up" that some emo or suicidal bulimic girl made.
For instance, i felt that i haven't done anything significant in my life.
Sure i once was able to make a girl smile and thought of me a lot of times.
Some of people would classified that as a 'gift' of making someone feel special and consider it as a significant contribution to society but nope. That just does not look like a 'contribution' to me.
I wondered if i died right now.
I don't know what i want people to remember me for since i haven't done anything yet with my life.
One of Anne Frank's wish is to live on forever even after her death.
Her wish is carried through her diary. Millions of people touched by her experiences written beautifully through her entries. Some even listed her as a personal hero in their facebook profiles.
That's her contribution. That's her legacy.
She's able to distinguish herself out of millions of kids who died in the concentration camps. To do something significant is to do something that would define you as an individual. To stand out from the rest.
Millions of people reside today in our blue planet.
Every 3 seconds some new residents are made. They all started as ambitious little explorer. Big dreams. Big hopes. Everything was simple.
They turn 5. Go to school. Meet new people. Learn some rules. Everything has to be systematic.
Their hormones start to kick in. Slowly they learn not every dreams would come true. Jackpot! congratulation, you just ate Eden's forbidden apple. Their eyes are opened. They learned the bitter truth. They feel confused. They feel alone. They feel scared. Everything seems chaotic.
They got into college. They got to be realistic by now. They become less excited. Less alive. They kill their own dreams. Eveything seems dull.
Doing the same routine. Doing the same job. Go to school. Beating their own minds and bodies to earn degree just to have a job to pay their kids to the same paths that they all went through. No surprise. Life is just a big circle after all.
It doesn't even take 5 minutes to understand the passage above. We all can relate to that.
Well i don't wanna be those people. I wanna do something different. Something exciting. I don't wanna feel i'm messing up with my life. I wanna break that circle.
Is it still possible to grow up while having a kid's mind at the same time?
Big time.
...I imagine now that Tony would come up to me and lecture me about all the negative attitudes that i have toward life.
But hear my argument first.
I think that all of us are in that situation at some point; But unlike others, this is not the kind of "mess up" that some emo or suicidal bulimic girl made.
For instance, i felt that i haven't done anything significant in my life.
Sure i once was able to make a girl smile and thought of me a lot of times.
Some of people would classified that as a 'gift' of making someone feel special and consider it as a significant contribution to society but nope. That just does not look like a 'contribution' to me.
I wondered if i died right now.
I don't know what i want people to remember me for since i haven't done anything yet with my life.
One of Anne Frank's wish is to live on forever even after her death.
Her wish is carried through her diary. Millions of people touched by her experiences written beautifully through her entries. Some even listed her as a personal hero in their facebook profiles.
That's her contribution. That's her legacy.
She's able to distinguish herself out of millions of kids who died in the concentration camps. To do something significant is to do something that would define you as an individual. To stand out from the rest.
Millions of people reside today in our blue planet.
Every 3 seconds some new residents are made. They all started as ambitious little explorer. Big dreams. Big hopes. Everything was simple.
They turn 5. Go to school. Meet new people. Learn some rules. Everything has to be systematic.
Their hormones start to kick in. Slowly they learn not every dreams would come true. Jackpot! congratulation, you just ate Eden's forbidden apple. Their eyes are opened. They learned the bitter truth. They feel confused. They feel alone. They feel scared. Everything seems chaotic.
They got into college. They got to be realistic by now. They become less excited. Less alive. They kill their own dreams. Eveything seems dull.
Doing the same routine. Doing the same job. Go to school. Beating their own minds and bodies to earn degree just to have a job to pay their kids to the same paths that they all went through. No surprise. Life is just a big circle after all.
It doesn't even take 5 minutes to understand the passage above. We all can relate to that.
Well i don't wanna be those people. I wanna do something different. Something exciting. I don't wanna feel i'm messing up with my life. I wanna break that circle.
Is it still possible to grow up while having a kid's mind at the same time?
Friday, August 7, 2009
Addiction
I'm not sure why i log in blogger anymore.
I certainly realize that keeping an online journal for me to reflect things isn't my thing anymore. I rather go reading someone else's blog rather than writing more stories, making fun out of myself and everyone around me, and thinking about more sarcastic comments or funny remark to write on.
Okay, here's the 'but' part.
But.... the more i thought about not writing more stuff... the more i unconsciously typed 'blogger.com' on the browser. That doesn't seem normal. Addiction towards things that you don't even do anymore.
Finally i decided to give in and blog about this stuff.
"addiction"
that doesn't make any sense.
But then again: who cares?
I certainly realize that keeping an online journal for me to reflect things isn't my thing anymore. I rather go reading someone else's blog rather than writing more stories, making fun out of myself and everyone around me, and thinking about more sarcastic comments or funny remark to write on.
Okay, here's the 'but' part.
But.... the more i thought about not writing more stuff... the more i unconsciously typed 'blogger.com' on the browser. That doesn't seem normal. Addiction towards things that you don't even do anymore.
Finally i decided to give in and blog about this stuff.
"addiction"
that doesn't make any sense.
But then again: who cares?
Friday, July 24, 2009
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